Propheteering

Recently I’ve been hearing a lot about prophecies that Donald Trump will somehow overcome his Electoral College deficit and somehow win the Presidency. I’ve talked to people who have heard these prophecies, and they absolutely, with complete confidence, believe that Trump will win. I have a message for my Christian brothers and sisters who place their hopes, and their emotional security, in prophecies that align with their own political desires: get used to disappointment.

Because here’s the thing, false prophets and false prophecies are nothing new. In fact, they’re very old. Mercy me, there was a false teacher in the Garden! A false PROPHET in the Garden. So, it should come as no surprise that there are false prophets today. The scriptures tell us that there will be false teachers in the New Testament era. There are warnings throughout Paul’s writings to not simply accept prophecies, but to weigh them carefully. And a LOT of things have to go into the process of weighing a prophecy.

Now, I’m not a charistmatic Christian, in the sense that I’m not a member of a Pentacostal or Pentacostal-leaning Church. But I don’t despise prophecy, or the other gifts – in fact, as dubious as I am of the VAST majority of people who claim to speak in tongues I believe it’s a real phenomenon that really still happens today – I just don’t think it happens as often or how most people claim. But that’s another essay – or series. So, to be fair, I don’t have any Charismatic bona fides. But I have read the Bible enough times that I ran out of fingers and toes and I’ve spent a few hours here and there studying theology, so I’m not ignorant of the biblical and theological data.

So, what I’d like to do in a VERY short space (well, short for me) is to lay out a breviary on how to spot false prophets.

First, if they prophesy in the Name of the Lord and they are wrong. Now, this would seem very obvious to anyone ignorant enough to simply read the Old Testament Laws concerning false prophets and presume that the normative text is normative – frankly, you’ve gotta be a bit of a bumpkin to make that kind of exegetical error, but I digress. The OT is clear, painfully clear, that those who utter false prophecies in the name of the Lord are false prophets and they are to be stoned to death.

Unfortunately, we don’t stone these people to death anymore. Which is really a shame because these hucksters continue to fleece the flock whilst they spew man-pleasing trash. I’m all for prophets. I really truly am. But I’m all for prophets who will make a deal: I’ll hear you out, but if you get it wrong we get to stave your skull in with stones. That’s my offer. Anyone who wants to prophesy in my church can, so long as they agree to that deal.[1]

But, see, I’m ignorant and think that prophesying false prophesies makes you a false prophet. Not so, say many in the New Apostolic movement and their acolytes. Years ago, I was a guest preacher at a Pentecostal church – and I spoke there pretty often – and one of the families told me that at a Rod Parsley event someone had prophesied that they would have a baby within a year. I, being the fundy rube I am asked where was the little tyke. They said that they hadn’t had the child yet. Since the lady didn’t look any pregnanter than I’d seen her for the past few months I asked when the prophecy’d been uttered. It was made 2 plus years before that. I said, well, then he’s a false prophet. They said “no,” that there are “levels” of prophesy. They were still waiting expectantly for that bebe. I don’t know if it ever came. I hope it did, because they were sweet people…sweet, gullible people.

See, there aren’t “levels”. There are prophecies that come true and then there are false prophecies. There’s no middle ground; no third way. Now look, I believe (because it’s happened to me multiple times) that I’m being given a special message to give to someone – and sometimes it makes no sense to me. So I tell the person. But I make no pretense as it being the Word of God, because maybe it isn’t. And I know a LOT of people like me, people who are pro-gifts but not really “charismatic” who’ve had similar experiences.

I’m not against prophecy! I’ve God has a prophecy He wants me to utter; I want to receive it! If He wants me to say, “thus saith the LORD” to something not in the Biblical text, wonderful! I want everything God has for me. But without the clarity that what I’m saying really is the Word of God, I’m not going to claim it to so be! Am I comfortable sharing intimations and hints and “words of knowledge”? Sure – as long as I make the proviso that I’m not uttering prophesy, but just saying something I felt I should say.

Now, some would criticize me as being cowardly. OK. I want to be innocent as regards evil. I want to be cowardly about displeasing God, because I fear the Lord. If God wants to rebuke me for being less dogmatic about things I doubt, hey, He’s God. But I don’t think that’s how God operates. I’m going on about this because I think it’s important for us to recognize that God can give people impulses and feelings to share and not give the clarity that it is the Word of God. I don’t despise that. When people tell me things like that, I thank them and then ponder their words. Maybe it’s not direct from God, maybe it’s just the Holy Spirit given wisdom of a godly man or woman who is sharing their insight with me. I’m glad to have it. I rejoice to get wisdom from the wise!

Second, just because someone gives a “true” prophecy doesn’t make them a true prophet. You see false prophets can be false for a couple reasons. A) for making prophecies that are false or B) for teaching heresy elsewhere. God says – see a lot of problems would be solved if we’d take the time to read ALL of God’s word – that sometimes He’ll allow a false prophet to make prophecies which come true, or do miracles, but they are trying to turn people from Yahweh. God says He’ll let them actually give true prophecies or do miracles to test the people.

Now, if the God of the OT is the same God of the Church Age, and I have it on good authority He is, then we should expect God to permit people to do miracles and make correct predictive prophecy even though they are out-and-out heretics who are turning people from the orthodox faith.

So, a “prophet” can be a false prophet if their prophecies are false. OR if their prophecies come true but their theology is heretical. The true prophet gets it right 100% of the time and they teach sound doctrine.

OK, now on to the stuff that’s going to make people mad.

There are a lot of people saying President Trump is going to pull off a miracle and be inaugurated this coming January. They are placing their faith in the words of these prophets who are saying that they have heard from God that Trump’s gonna pull it off.

OK. I mean, maybe. But it looks unlikely. And we’ll know soon and very soon whether these prophets were correct of whether they deserve to be anathematized and banished from the Church so they can never deceive people again. Because false prophets really do hurt the church. They really do shipwreck people’s faith. They really do make us look ridiculous, when we don’t need to. There are some things that the Christian must believe and proclaim that the world finds ridiculous – and liberalism tries to accommodate the world by jettisoning those things. Ya know, things like, miracles, the resurrection of Jesus, divine creation, the resurrection of Jesus, the worldwide flood, the resurrection of Jesus, stuff like that. The liberal is so afraid to be made a laughingstock that they throw the baby out with the bathwater. The gullible charismatic, is so unafraid, so brazen in the face of things that bring shame to the church that they take on needless scorn and derision by not using any critical thinking or even biblical reading skills. They want to keep the baby AND the bathwater. I’m trying to tell us we can keep the baby and throw out the bathwater.

If people want to prophesy in the Name of the Lord, great! Moses wished all the Lord’s people were prophets. I do too! It would make investing in my retirement portfolio a much more attractive proposition! But the fact is that all aren’t. And there are false prophets. And from the looks of it it seems there are a lot of people saying that Biden will not be inaugurated.

But let’s just say…just as a CRAZY for-instance…let’s just say, and I know that there’s no historical or biblical precedent for this, but let’s just say that God allows a nation to be punished for sin and that punishment will affect, negatively affect, the material experience of the people of God. I know, I know, it’s such a foolish notion that God would allow His people to suffer in this world. I know it’s just ridiculous to believe that God would ever allow a political candidate to come to power who isn’t the preferred choice of Christians. If this had happened ever before, ever, I might have a case. But just hear out my for-instance. Let’s say Joseph R. Biden does become the next president because he is inaugurated. What then?

Will your faith be shivered on the craggy rocks of reality in the brutal coasts of false-hope? Will your confidence put you to shame? Because that is the biblical term for trusting in a false-hope – it’s to be ashamed. Humiliation comes from relying on a false hope. And I don’t like to see the people of God humiliated. Because I love them. I don’t like to see the people of God shame-faced and mocked – because I love them.

Now, maybe this for-instance is wrong. I’m not claiming any special knowledge – at least no knowledge specialer than anyone with a Bible, history books, and a newspaper could present. I could be wrong. And frankly; I hope I am. I voted for President Trump, not because I think he’s a stellar guy, but because I think his vision for America more closely aligns with mine, which I hope and pray more closely aligns with God’s than Joe Biden’s. I want President Trump to win. But I don’t think he will. And I’m afraid that all these people who are desperately hoping that these prophets are right are going to be sorely disappointed. And what will happen then?

What happens when someone trusts in something false and is thereupon ashamed and humiliated? Well, the same thing that happens when someone trusts any other kind of idol: they’ll hate the idol; hate themselves; or live in denial…or any combination thereof. And that’s all fine and well. Except a lot of times, when people reject a false view of Christianity they do so by rejecting the true Christ too.

Let me conclude by saying this: if President Trump miraculously wins the Presidency – great. That doesn’t make these prophets true prophets but it doesn’t immediately make them false, and their theology ought to be closely inspected (as the Bible commands). If Joe Biden wins, that doesn’t mean that Christ has left us orphans. If Joe Biden wins and the Church despairs, we will be sinning. It is a sin to despair because when we despair it means we’ve lost hope in God and lost trust in Him and lost faith in Him – and you can only lose, faith, hope, and trust, before you lose love. Let’s not despair, because there’s no need to despair. Last I checked God outranks POTUS.

Oh, and one last final note. Beware of people who tell you what you want to hear. The wounds of a friend can be trusted.

[1] OK, so I checked, and apparently what I’m describing under current law is considered “murder”. Apparently you can’t do that. Unless it’s to a baby. Babies are fine to murder. You can totally murder babies! Wellllllll, you can murder them as long as you’ve sworn an oath to do no harm and get a license to murder form the state that enforces the laws…against…mur…der. But stoning false prophets isn’t state sanctioned – and it wouldn’t happen to babies, cause they don’t utter false prophesies (at least I don’t think so; I don’t’ speak baby) – and because we’re civilized, modern, compassionate people we only murder babies, not adults who deserve it. So, stoning is right out…which is unfortunate because I found a lot of nice stones. Ah, Alack and Alas!